Sometimes I think my desire to travel is just a desire to escape this one life. But, I have a desire to live a million lives. 

The heart of my being

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. 
Mark Twain

I find that this quote chimes so truly with the heart of my being. Not because I live so fastly by it, but because I strive so much to live as if I did.

I see it all around me…to live, you must live life to its fullest, have confidence in yourself, explore, dream, discover. It’s a very important thing…the goals of our existence. The goal of our being… the heart of my being. But under my mask…my confidence is dashed and my heart is crumbling. I want to share it with you…I wish I could share it with you all. But these walls of self-doubt and anxiety chain me to a pot-holed surface of un-lived dreams and desires. Instead, I let the frivolities of life scrape at the surface of my deeply entombed existence.

So you say, one must push the boat out? Yes I see… and for me, this is a question of living or dying. Surely, the answer is easy. To live, or to die. Which would you choose? But, I feel that achieving this answer is the most difficult part. It’s all the working out…that’s where the majority of the marks lie for this test. 

So I know that I must continue to work at this…the heart of my being…so that one day I may be even further from my anchored harbour and closer to my sails of discovery.  

To live truly, now that is a daring adventure.

Merry Christmas Eve Eve!!

This song from Michael Buble's new christmas album makes me want to dance!

Last Month...in a chestnut!

To cover my poor posting abilities of last month and because so much happened that I want to remember...here's a rundown of 10 things that went dowwwn in the month of November!

1. Quit hellish waitressing job.

2. Started sprouting too many spots to count!

3. As one door closed, another one opened...I got offered a new job!

4. But continued to sprout spots!

5. Our adult syncrhonized skating team won bronze medals in the British :)

6. Spots still remained!!

7. Started new job.

8. Spots erupted!

9. Stayed in new job.

10. I zapped my spots- woooo!!!

December!

I can't quite believe it...its December! The snow has fallen and our Christmas tree is up! Where did the time fly....?

Piano Elegance

I love music and I love the elegant qualities of piano music. 

I wrote my last post, about a dream I had, whilst listening to a similar version of this, "My Heart Will Go On" on piano.  

Dreams are..

I dreamt a dream.

A dream, not a story or a nightmare, a dream. 

An immense empty hall.

Lit by candles; held up high and low by enchantment.

The sounds of music echo from wall to wall.

A peaceful music, a reflective beautiful kind of music.

The air feels cold and damp as I glide across the room through layers of floating mists.

It is peaceful, magical and still. 

At one end of the hall, the tall entrance doors are FLUNG open to the elements. 

The howling winds of the winters evening WHIP around the rink. 

The candlelight flickers and dims without going out. 

With each jump, spin and move that I take; I am lifted off the frozen grounds and carried along by the whipping air.
I am flying, flying and dancing. 

This way, 

and that way.

With complete control, elegance and grace. 

The music gets louder and the winds get stronger.

And so with each beat, my heart rises and my feet are grounded for that split second. 

I could do this all night...

And so.. for me, this is what dreams are made of.